The Inability to Assert Yourself

by / 1 Comment / 815 View / July 8, 2010

In my post about Private Fears and Personal Demons I promised to talk about some of the fears that we can identify in handwriting. So here is one of them – “The inability to assert yourself.”

This can be a rather debilitating trait because it tends to weaken and dis-empower you. Once you are able to identify it you will see quite clearly how this is indeed a fear and how it can hold people back from achieving their goals.

The inability to assert yourself is a fear that comes in many guises and it can have several repercussions.

So what does it mean if you can’t assert yourself?

It really means that you have a fear of standing up for yourself. You are willing to let others walk all over you rather than appear too positive or decisive. For reasons of your own you prefer to avoid even the tiniest possibility of a conflict.

But it goes further than that because it can also mean that you are easily dominated and that you could allow yourself to bullied.

So how does anyone land up with this type of attitude?

By acquiring the habit of avoiding confrontation at all costs, by agreeing too easily, by co-operating to an excessive and unnecessary degree and by showing little or no resistance.

A Non-Assertive Handwriting

How then do we see these trends in someone’s handwriting?

Here are a few handwriting signs to look for:

  • Very light pressure which in itself shows a lack of assertiveness
  • Small sized handwriting that indicates a desire to be unobtrusive
  • A conventional style that has no outstanding qualities
  • Low and weak t-bars that reveal a feeling of inferiority
  • Short or weak lower loops that show a lack of follow through.

The Passive Aggressive Personality

Sometimes the person who is unable to assert herself develops secondary defense mechanisms to help her cope.  In other words she will resort to other ways of putting up with her problem. She may display signs of passive aggressive behaviour such as sulking or behaving like a victim.

She may also harbour some inner resentments or display petty behaviour.

It may even manifest as a type of vanity where she tries to show you that;  “I am different and superior and I don’t need you in my life.”

All these things are just a few ways of coping with her inability to make a stand which is something that she finds so difficult to do.

Being assertive does not mean being aggressive

The ability to assert yourself does not require you to be aggressive.  You can still be a quiet and peace-loving person.

But it does mean that you need to have a reserve of inner strength available to you that you can call upon when the occasion demands.

One Comment

  1. Jenny
    July 11, 2010 at 9:23 pm
    Too true! Conflict is always uncomfortable but it can be the best way to deepen a relationship.

    prabhakar belavadi
    July 15, 2010 at 1:54 am
    I liked that statement, “Being assertive does not mean being aggressive”. I love your articles because of the simplicity and effective choice of words. It not only enters your brain but touches the heart of the reader like a rose. Keep the fragrance going.

    Augenoperation
    July 25, 2010 at 1:40 pm
    Congratulations, radio Gogo spoke about your blog at 11 am. The Inability to Assert Yourself | Graphology World. Good work. bye-bye

    cna
    August 5, 2010 at 2:42 am
    Great information! I’ve been looking for something like this for a while now. Thanks!

    spiderman
    August 13, 2010 at 8:18 pm
    You’ve got an attractive blog and offer wonderful facts. The content articles are fantastic to go through and you don´t use ads like all the other bloggers.

    Sandra
    August 17, 2010 at 10:00 am
    Thank you for all your kind comments. I look forward to adding more info that you will enjoy.

    Astrid Stankiewicz
    August 24, 2010 at 12:44 am
    Hi,
    I have been searching for some more information on this topic, and wonder if you can help me out? I found this website on MSN and would appreciate it if you could send me some more links on this topic by email.
    Thanks much in advance.

    Sandra
    August 24, 2010 at 1:17 pm
    Hi Astrid
Just keep checking the blog and I am sure I will cover more like this in the future.

    rankpay
    September 8, 2010 at 9:18 am
    I’m going to be tweeting this to my followers as I think it’s pretty important. I’m thinking this is the best post I’ve read on your blog yet.

    Rosalyn Blevins
    September 8, 2010 at 3:12 pm
    I love your site.

    housekeeping
    September 11, 2010 at 3:45 pm
    I think that is an interesting point, it made me think a bit. Thanks for sparking my thinking cap. Sometimes I get so much in a rut that I just feel like a record.

    mp3
    September 14, 2010 at 11:09 am
    I know this is really boring and you are skipping to the next comment, but I just wanted to throw you a big thanks – you cleared up some things for me!

    picnic
    September 15, 2010 at 1:36 pm
    One of the guys I follow on twitter twitted me your post. It’s a good read. Keep’em coming.

    separated
    September 27, 2010 at 8:18 am
    Very insightful post, will have to tell my friends to come visit and reap this gem of knowledge

    Vimax
    October 7, 2010 at 4:15 am
    This is a smart blog. I mean it. You have so much knowledge about this issue, and so much passion. You also know how to make people rally behind it, obviously from the responses. Youve got a design here thats not too flashy, but makes a statement as big as what youre saying. Great job, indeed.

    FFXIV guide says:
    October 7, 2010 at 5:39 am
    This is just downright incredible.

    LEGO
    October 10, 2010 at 1:46 am
    Hello, nice article and wonderful and structured blog.

    Amina
    October 27, 2010 at 11:11 am
    Good Day, Dear blogger!
My name is Alexandra i live in Germany and I am Psychologist.
You wrote a long topic. I added it to my IE feed reader.
I want to re-post your info to my web-site.
Can i to do that, if I add a bold linkback to your good web-site ?
Looks like your fine personal blog has seven thousands visitors at your successful site.

    Dorian Vanhyning
    November 8, 2010 at 11:35 am
    I’d like to thank you for the efforts you have made writing this post. You’ve an inspiration for me. I have forwarded this to a friend of mine.

    Rebecca Jenison
    November 27, 2010 at 3:43 pm
    Really nice post,thank you, best website ever

    Malowanie
    November 27, 2010 at 8:51 pm
    You are professional.

    Latrisha Waggner
    November 28, 2010 at 12:34 am
    very interesting information! .

    Denzin
    December 13, 2010 at 6:29 pm
    A reputable and well put together write-up which will act to guide searchers to discover much more about this issue. I notice that you appear to be remarkably high in positioning within the yahoo and google and for that I congratulate you – it’s not easy nowadays attempting to get ranking webpages or even indeed sites. Your internet site is worthy however and I can understand the reasons why you’re rated in such a superior position.

What do you think?

%d bloggers like this: